Harper’s Birth Story

I decided to finally share Harper’s birth story for those who care to read.

Disclaimer: this is a birth story, so there will be talk of some tmi stuff . . . Having a baby is not rainbows and sunshine. Be prepared for a long read, I wanted to record I all the details.

It all started on Wednesday December 7th, it was a pretty normal day, I went to work as usual. I WAS super uncomfortable and tired from lack of sleep (I was 38 weeks anyway) but I always felt that way so I didn't think anything of it. I had one contraction during my whole 10 hour shift that day, and it didn't hurt so no big deal I kept thinking. I was supposed to have an OB appointment the next day, but I wasn't hopeful because the previous weeks appointment revealed I was no where near being close to delivery. So I had texted jacob earlier in the day saying I wanted to go to chandler mall and walk around, not to put me into labor, but to get some things going so my appointment wouldn't be disappointing. 

   When I got off at 6:30 I came home and while jacob was getting ready so we could leave I started having contractions. I had 2 of them close together so I started timing them, I just figured they were Braxton hicks again. During the car ride to the mall I had a few more contractions. My timer revealed that they weren't consistent, though they were close together. We got to the mall and jacob was really nervous, he kept saying, "you're in labor, we shouldn't be doing this." But I shrugged him off saying I wasn't in labor, and I actually was feeling really good despite having contractions (they were uncomfortable, but not painful). While walking around the mall I stopped timing the contractions because they weren't consistent. They were coming every 10 minutes, then every 7 minutes, then back to 10 minutes, then back to 5 minutes. So I convinced myself it was just false labor (I had no idea what to go on since I'd never been in labor) 

   we left the mall and I was starving so jacob got me some In 'n' Out (yum!) we got home and I ate all of my food, I wasn't having contractions anymore so I still wasn't nervous. We put Ellie to bed and just relaxed, I told myself I would clean the apartment tomorrow (my day off) and get the rest of the bag packed. Around 10:30 jacob and I did our scripture study and I went to sleep while jacob stayed up kneeling at the side of the bed looking at Facebook, and doing some personal scripture study. 

   I was asleep for almost and hour when I suddenly woke up with a painful contraction. It felt like a huge cramp in my lower abdomen. Jacob was still in the same spot so I grabbed his arm until it passed. He gave me a wary look and I said "no big deal, I'm sure it won't happen again." I didn't mention to him that I was feeling an insane amount of pressure "down there", I got a little uneasy but I tried to go back to sleep. Not even 5 minutes later I had another super painful contraction, I grabbed Jacobs arm again and breathed through it, all the while the pressure I was feeling got more intense. When the contraction ended, I suddenly felt like I was peeing my pants, and then it felt like a water balloon popped between my legs. I knew what it was. "Oh crap!" Was all I said, and Jacob looked at me and said, "your water broke didn't it?!" I said yes and he started flying into action; calling family, throwing things into the hospital bag, and taking things to the car. 

   I got off the bed and waddled toward the bathroom and took off my wet things and sat on the toilet to let the water go into it and so I could check and make sure the fluid was clear (it was) I sat there for a few minutes until jacob came back from the car. I had him get me some dry undies and pants and then started grabbing last minute items, stopping every once in a while to breath through a contraction. They were hurting now and coming about every 3 minutes. I told jacob to stop rushing and that we didn't have to go to the hospital right now because I read you're supposed to be having contractions consistently for an hour before heading to the hospital, but jacob said "I don't think you're supposed to wait when your water breaks, we're going." I tried calling my doctor but no answer (I expected that because it was now 11:30pm) 

   Jacob took the last of our things and the car seat down to the car and while he was down at the car my mom showed up to stay with Ellie (who was still sleeping amidst this chaos) I asked my mom why she was here by herself and my dad wasn't with her (our plan was to have my dad watch Ellie so my mom could be there for the delivery) she told me my dad came home from a business trip earlier and had come down with a sore throat and cough so she was going to stay with Ellie instead. My heart sank, I had wanted my mom to be there to help me through this because I had no idea what to do. Jacob came back and hurried me out the door even though I started having a contraction and needed to stop and breath. He got me down the stairs and ran to pull the car closer while I slowly hobbled after him. 

   Jacob drove like a mad man, he thought he needed to speed to get me there in time. On the freeway, he sped up to 105mph. I was freaking out because the urgency was making me hyperventilate. I shouted at him to slow down. He didn't. I had a contraction and in the moment of pain I begged him to slow down, I said that it would be no good if he got pulled over because then we'd be even more delayed. I reassured him that she wasn't coming out this instant and that we had time. He finally slowed down to around 75mph. We got to the hospital and jacob dropped me off at the entrance so I could check in while he parked. I got up to the door and it was locked since it was after 8pm. I rang the bell and no one answered. I tried again and still no answer. I was thinking I had the wrong entrance or something. I had another contraction and bent over to get through it. Jacob ran up at this point and asked why I wasn't inside. I pointed to the call button and told him no one was answering. He hit the button and finally someone answered and let us in. While we were checking in the attendant was having trouble finding my records (I hadn't pre registered yet but my drs office should have transferred that info weeks ago) I was standing in the room having still having contractions, so the lady hurried up and had someone take me back without banding me. We got to our triage room and I got into my granny suit. The nurses started an IV and asked started asking questions, they asked if I had any complications during Ellie's birth and I told the no she was only c-section because she was breech and everyone froze, I quickly told them I was wanting a VBAC and they relaxed, they were afraid they should be prepping the OR for a repeat c-section. 

   The contractions were getting pretty intense, but I just held Jacobs hand and zoned everyone out, concentrating on my breathing, and I was ok. Jacob was watching the monitor and would let me know when a contraction was coming so I could grab his hand, then he would let me know when it peaked and then when it started going down. This helped me a lot so I knew when it was going to end. A nurse told me she was going to check how dilated I was. While she was checking me I had a contraction and let me tell you, having someone's hand up inside you while having a contraction, was not pleasant! I wanted to shout mean things at the nurse for not waiting to check me after a contraction. But I didn't say anything, just yelled in pain. I was at a 3 and counting. 

   We were taken to labor and delivery and our room was at the very end of a long hallway. When we got to the room, the nurses informed me that the anesthesiologist was on the same floor prepping someone for a c-section, and that when he was done he could come give me my epidural. I hesitated because I was only a 3 and didn't want to get it too early, but the nurse reassured me it would be better to get it now while he was close, than wait until later when he wasn't close by. She also told me that I was progressing very quickly and that I would be ok. So I agreed, still a little hesitant. While waiting for them to get there they got me started on antibiotics since I was strep b positive.

   About 20 minutes later the anesthesiologist came in and gave me the epidural, they made jacob sit down in front of my so he wouldn't pass out (apparently they'd seen too many queasy husbands keel over haha) I grabbed onto his arms and held on tightly because I felt a contraction coming on. He put the epidural in and it hurt a lot! But I was grateful I was getting it now instead of when I was writhing in pain. I got settled and the nurse told us to try and get some sleep (it was about 1:30am at this point) before the nurse left though she put a peanut ball between my legs to help me dilate. Jacob conked right out on the couch they had but I was too uncomfortable to be anywhere close to sleep. Also, since our room was at the end of a hall, there was a laundry chute in the wall and every so often we'd hear a loud thumping noise as things went down it. I just enjoyed my time waiting. It was relaxing to not feel any pain from the contractions, but I could still feel the tightening and I could feel her moving downward in my pelvis so I knew I was making progress. 

   I got checked around 3:30am again and I was at 7cm. The nurse couldn't believe how fast I was moving since this was my first labor. She changed my padding (I was still leaking water) and had me switch sides. Then she came back around 5:15 to check again and I was at 10cm. Jacob woke up when he heard her say that and came over by me. The nurse paged the dr on call (my dr was scheduled to come in at 7am but baby was coming fast) the nurse had me do a couple practice pushes then had me stop because she was right there ready to come out. I could feel her too, it felt like I was holding a bowling ball down there. The dr came in to check and the nurse told him I was ready, he said I would have to wait because there was another woman a few rooms away also ready to go, but she didn't have an epidural so she was yelling. I told him that was fine (I wasn't quite ready in my mind! Things were happening too fast!) it didn't take very long, about 15 minutes and he was back. Then the pushing began. It only took about 3 pushes and then he told me that the next push she would be out. I put everything I could into that last push and at 6:15am, I felt her come out. The first thing I noticed was that she was TINY, and then she started crying, and then I started crying. I was in shock how everything happened so fast yet at the same time it happened so smoothly. After she got her nose and mouth suctioned, the dr laid her on me and the nurse started toweling her off. I looked at my baby, my tiny baby, and I was so in love. She had big beautiful eyes that were staring around and I laughed at her expression, she had a look on her face that was like, "what just happened?!" After she was cleaned off, jacob cut the cord and Harper and I had some skin to skin time while the dr cleaned me up. I did tear and needed some stitches, so I was glad I couldn't feel anything! Once he was done and they cleared everything, the nurse took Harper to do her tests across the room. She weighed 6lbs 5oz and was 20 and a half inches long. Much smaller than Ellie who was 7lbs 1oz and 21 inches. Everything looked good with her so she wrapped her up and jacob got to hold her for the first time. He held her for a while and then handed her back to me so we could try breastfeeding. She didn't seem too interested though so we said we would try later. So I just held her and looked at her. I still couldn't believe that she was here. 10 days early and we were not prepared at all but so glad she came. They say your heart grows bigger every baby you have and it's true. I am so grateful that I was able to have a smooth and successful VBAC 

Keeping up with the Colvins

Keeping up with the Colvins (haha)

  

Time for another update! I was recently reading my old blog posts and I am sad that I am so horrible at keeping it updated so that is my new goal! So 2015 flew past in a blur, and now it's 2016. Time really does go by so much faster after high school. So let's see, where to start? Well I will start when we bought our first car! Well, first to us, because we purchased it through a dealership and not Craigslist. It's a 2006 Honda Pilot and we love it, although it was sad to see my Bravada retire, I learned how to drive in that car and had it through high school. 

  

Christmas 2015, was a wonderful family Christmas, it was so much fun for us because Ellie was a bit older and could somewhat understand how Christmas worked. She loved it! 

On the other hand, Christmas was the day we decided to move. Again. Wait, didn't we just move? Well yes, we lived in our little 2 bed, 1 bath for about 2 years and we loved it, except for having noisy neighbors all the time. The kitchen was also TINY and I love to cook and bake so we decided to upgrade and move to an upstairs apartment to avoid having stomping neighbors.

So we are all moved in to our new place and so far we love it. The kitchen is huge! Yay! So the next big thing to happen was this;

We were so excited! It was a different experience this go around because we were trying to get pregnant, so it was no surprise that soon after we began trying I started feeling symptoms and we took a test on April 8th and got a positive! We almost thought it was negative actually because the first line was so faint. But it  was there! 

This pregnancy has been a doozy let me tell you! I had it so easy with Ellie! I never threw up during my pregnancy with Ellie, I was just super nauseous. This go-around however I have thrown up multiple times. I was SOOO sick! I was constantly tired and irritable, (poor Jacob haha) I had no energy or will to take care of my toddler or my house for that matter. It was a long first trimester. 

I am 20 weeks now and things are looking up. I can eat again and have a little more energy but still tire easily. I have horrible round ligament pain that sometimes makes it hurt to move, I never had that with Ellie. 

Ellie by the way is SO excited to be a big sister. We kept asking her if she wanted a little brother or a sister and she always said sister. Well she got her wish! 

 We will soon have 2 little girls! We are thrilled and I am so excited to get the girl's room all pretty! We haven't decided on a name yet though. We still have time I guess. 

Ellie turned 3 years old recently, What?! Three?! 

She is such a big girl now. She is independent and sassy! She talks so well it's sometimes scary! She talks better than some 5 year olds I know. She is about 70% potty trained I would say, she is very good at telling us when she needs to go potty, except for #2, and we still put her in diapers at night because she always seems to need to go. She's getting there! Once she is fully trained she will get a big girl bed! 

Jacob is still going to ASU and he is so ready to be done! He is tired of doing pre-reqs and just wants to be in dental school  already! We recently took a trip to Salt Lake City Utah so he could go to a conference and University of Utah. He got to spend the whole day there learning about their programs for dental students, and he even got to do some drilling! ( On fake teeth of course) He is super excited to start dental school soon. He has one more semester at ASU and then he will have his Bachelor's degree in Biochemistry! Whoohoo! 

So that's pretty much the jist of what's been going on recently. There's so much more but I need to be better at this blogging thing so I can remember it all! Until next time! 

Catching Up

Wow I suck at keeping this blog updated, for those that still care to read, here's an update of what's been going on the past year an a half of our lives!

We moved out of first apartment

My brother came home from his mission in Alabama!

We went camping for Spring Break and it was freezing cold!

Ellie met her cousin Bradley

And Auntie Jenna!

Someone turned a year old!

Ellie and I went to Seattle with my parents and brother for my sister's wedding.

We went to the Gilbert Temple open house

I left my job at Petsmart (after 6 years!) and got a new job working for a chiropractor! 

Had a nice Christmas together as a family. Although we had all spent the days leading up to Christmas with the stomach flu. Ewww.

So that's a little picture update. This past year and a half has flown by and sometimes I think I didn't get to stop and enjoy the moments. Things I have noticed lately are that I don't take enough pictures. My Instagram would say otherwise, but  I feel like I don't have enough pictures to look back on! So that is something I am going to work on. Another huge thing that happened that I don't have a picture of is that Jacob started ASU! So exciting, things are moving along for his education. Although, ASU is not my favorite school right now (and I don't even go there!) ASU is extremely expensive and they charge for everything. Jacob got financial aid but it is still super expensive. The past 2 semesters have been very hard with juggling work and school (for Jake) and parenthood. Poor Jacob has been so stressed. We know it will all be worth it but we have many years to go before we can really settle down. We have had many trials such as car problems, IRS issues, sickness, and medical expenses to go along with that. It has been very tough but I keep telling myself that someone out there has it worse than us and we should be grateful to have what we have, including our trials. Our trials will make us stronger even though at the moment it doesn't feel like it. We just have to keep our heads above water and we will make it! 

A little about our munchkin Ellie, she has grown so much! Literally! She is very tall for her age! Haha she is very smart too. She loves to talk and explore. She keeps us and her Grandparents running! She learned to walk at 9 months, started saying actual words around 10 months, and started testing her boundaries at 11 months! She is a trouble maker for sure and with advanced learning come pre terrible two tantrums haha. She already is a feisty one but is also a big love bug. She will get into trouble and when we scold her, she comes and gives us a kiss. She is not a very picky eater (she loves meat!) and she loves the water, I want to get her into swim lessons! Jacob and I have learned a lot from becoming parents, like patience. That is a big one lol. We love being parents though and we adore our little girl more than anything. 

Thanks for reading our little update! 

Ellie's 2 month update and my 2 month postpartum update!

     So today was Ellie's 2 month Dr's appt which I have been dreading because that means 2 month shots. :( I wasn't there when Ellie got her first shots in the hospital but Jacob said she screamed pretty good. Well the appt went very smoothly! She was all happy an smiley the whole time up until they gave her the shots. She cried for about 30 seconds tops and then once I picked her up she calmed right down and even let me feed her! After that she went to sleep! I was so amazed I got off easy! (Little did I know what a couple hours later would hold) So here are her stats; she is 10 lbs and 7 oz which puts her in the 30th percentile for weight and Dr. Guthrie said that was in the average, and she is 23 inches long which puts her in the 80th percentile for height! Holy cow she's gonna be a tall girl! Dr. Guthrie checked everything else and declared her a perfectly healthy baby! I was a proud mommy! Later in the afternoon though after she woke up from her nap, the poor thing started to feel the effects of the shots. She had 3 pokes total (one of the vaccines had 4 vaccines combined, I can't remember all the names) I could tell she was in pain because her cry was not her normal cry and she wouldn't eat, take a pacifier or be soothed by rocking. I gave her some Tylenol and that seemed to take the edge off but she was pretty much crying from 4pm-6:30pm, which was when I gave her her evening bath. She LOVES the bath so I was hopeful that it would settle her down and it did! She was crying right up until I put her in the water and then she stopped! After I got her in her PJ's and she and I played for a bit on our bed. She seemed like her normal, happy self! Then I fed her a little bit and she went to sleep which is right now, it's only been about half an hour so we'll see if she stays asleep. 
     So a little bit more about what Ellie has been up to the past 2 months, She wasn't an easy baby at first, she was very fussy and demanding and would cry out of nowhere. It was frustrating but now we are starting to get into a schedule so she has been much happier. We call her our little Drama Queen :) The first few weeks of her life she wasn't gaining enough weight so we started supplementing with formula. That was really tough because I had wanted to exclusively breastfeed but I wasn't also getting her to latch on properly which led to me getting torn apart when I did feed her. I was disappointed that I hadn't gotten more help and I still am, but I guess I will try again next time around. Now we have gotten into a rhythm now where I pump in the morning and evening (so those feedings are when she gets formula) and then the rest of the day I breastfeed and give her the milk that I pumped. So I would say she gets 3/4 breast milk and 1/4 formula and she has been doing well on that! Which makes me feel better because at least she is getting the benefits from the breast milk. So some other things, she smiles now in reaction to our faces and she follows us with her eyes which is fun! She loves music and enjoys laying on the floor kicking her legs with the music. She started rolling over at 2 weeks old which was exciting to see her do that. She is a very particular baby and thrives on routine, so we have to be pretty strict with our nighttime routine to get her to bed, (feed, bath, PJs, play, feed a little more again, rock her and then she's out! She has been such a joy to our lives and even though she's not always an easy baby, we wouldn't have it any other way because we adore her.

1 hour old 

1 month old

2 months old

     So I am pretty much back to normal now, the recovery from the c-section has had it's ups and downs, in the hospital it was frustrating because it hurt to move so I couldn't even get up to get my baby from the bassinet when she was crying, lucky I had Jacob! The first few weeks were pretty good, I just had to move slowly. What really sucked was getting out of bed in the middle of the night so we invested in a "Rock and Play" which is a sort of bassinet but it's at bed level so I could just reach over and pick her up without having to get out of the bed. I highly recommend it! Now I am feeling like myself, I have about 5 more pounds until my pre-pregnancy weight (although I wasn't in the best shape before I got pregnant so I have lots of work to do!) I can fit into my regular jeans! I only gained 25 pounds my whole pregnancy and lost 20 of it within the first 2 weeks which was nice. I wasn't all that big while pregnant (well, that's what everyone was telling me, I felt like a whale) I still wore all my regular clothes besides jeans.One of the horrible things that are still lingering are my baby belly (it looks like it did when I was 5 months pregnant) and stretch marks! Ohhhh how I hate stretch marks! I didn't get them until my last month of pregnancy, I had thought I would be one of the lucky women who never got stretch marks but oh no! I look like a tiger it's so bad! And they are still hanging around so if you have tips for getting rid of stretch marks please let me know! I have my mobility back and I plan to start working out again. It's so great to be back to normal but I do miss being pregnant. I had a pretty easy pregnancy, I think the most annoying side effects I had was lower back pain and peeing every 10 minutes (sorry tmi) but for the most part, it was smooth sailing! I miss feeling her kick and move around inside me, but I'd much rather have her here! I love being a Mom and wouldn't trade it for anything! 

Ellie's Birth

Whew! What a crazy past few weeks it has been! I wanted to get this post up sooner, but mommyhood is time consuming! Which is good! I'm typing this while little miss Ellie is in a milk coma haha. Alrighty, so July 29th was the day of our c-section, we didn't have to go to the hospital until 3pm so the time before that was so slow! We were both anxious to meet our baby, so we spent the morning cleaning, and  packing and getting last minute things ready. Finally it was time to go! My parents came over before we left and my Dad and Jacob gave me a blessing. Then we were off! We checked in and sadly, only one person was allowed back with me in Triage. So my parents had to stay in the waiting area. They took Jacob and I back and they started hooking me up to all the machines. We found out that I was having contractions at that point so it was a good thing this baby was coming today! I was so uncomfortable strapped to that bed! Her head was pushing up into my rib cage with each contraction. So after they got my IV in, the anesthesiologists came in to talk to me about how the spinal works and they gave me this HORRIBLE tasting drink to combat the nausea that the spinal causes. After the nurses were done asking me a million questions, they said now we just had to wait for my doctor to get here. They told me my c-section would have to be pushed back because they had an emergency c-section going on. Luckily, it was only pushed back like 30 minutes. 
     While we were waiting for my doctor to arrive, Jacob went to the waiting room and let my parents come back one at a time to see me before the c-section. They came and saw me, gave me words of comfort, then wished me luck! When Jacob came back the nurses sent him to go and get his jumpsuit on. I was left alone for like 5 minutes and that was when I started freaking out. I realized this was actually going to happen. In a few moments, I would be a mother and have a baby. That part didn't really freak me out, I was most worried about the spinal, I don't like being numbed and I disliked the idea of a needle going into my back. Jacob came back and I told him how I was feeling. He just gave me some comfort and he said he knew everything would be ok. He seemed so at ease so I felt better. At last they came to get me, they let me walk to the operating room which I was so grateful for! I was so uncomfortable that that short walk made me feel a lot better! They had Jacob wait outside the operating room while they set me up. I was shaking so bad while they were getting the spinal ready. I tried to hold still as they started. The guy giving me the spinal was sympathetic and kept assuring me everything was going fine. He stuck the needle in and it did hurt, but only for a moment, then it felt like pins and needles spreading through my back. It was weird! After they got that situated they laid me on my back and started prepping everything. It was awkward because I was completely naked except for my gown that was pulled up to my chest. I was just laying on the table, totally exposed. I guess when you have a baby, there's no shame haha. 
     The doctors got the curtain up, and then Jacob came in. He sat by me and held my hand, and it started. My doctor was talking to me from behind the curtain, letting me know what was happening. After a few minutes and told me I would feel a lot of pressure, I felt her pushing and tugging on the baby (whose head was still wedged in my ribs) and then I felt this weight lifted from the center of my body, I wondered if that was the Dr pulling Ellie out and my thought was answered by a little cry! I immediately started tearing up and I looked at Jacob and he started to cry too! They brought her around the curtain to show us briefly and I was so amazed that this little person had been inside me just seconds before. She started to really cry and they took her to get cleaned off. I had Jacob follow her so he could take pictures. I couldn't see her but I could sure hear her! I laid there listening to my baby cry and I was just in shock that we had just had a baby. It was so fast! After getting Ellie cleaned up, Jacob brought her over to me and the nurse laid her on my chest and let me hold her. We both just stared at each other. It was one of the best moments of my life. 
     They let me hold her for about 5 minutes, then they had Jacob take her and they went to recovery while they stitched me up. It took about 20 minutes, then I was wheeled to recovery where was had to stay for about 2 hours. They hooked me up to a ton of monitors, gave me some morphine and then the nurses helped me breastfeed Ellie for the first time. It was amazing the bond I felt with her. During this time, Jacob was sending pictures and updates to everyone waiting in the front. 
     Finally we were able to go to our room, and once we got situated, Jacob went to get everyone from the waiting room. I sort of remember everyone coming to visit, I was a little out of it haha. So much had happened! All I really remember is being super itchy! Apparently morphine makes you itchy. Soon, everyone left and we started our first night. I didn't sleep at all that first night! I just held baby Ellie and stared at her. I was afraid if I went to sleep I would wake up and it would all have been a dream, or I was afraid someone would  come and take her away from me. Silly I know but that's how I felt. Well that's the story of Ellie's birth! Now here's some pictures!

She wasn't happy to leave my belly

 The first time I held her

 After her first bath

 Daddy and daughter time :) 

 Our first family picture :)

 Going home!

 She has big blue eyes! 

My experience with having an External Cephalic Version

This morning we were scheduled to have our baby turned. It's official name is called and "External Cephalic Version." The doctors and nurses just refer to it as a version. We went in at 7:45am to the hospital. My mom and dad came with us as well for support. They took us back to Triage where they hooked me up to a fetal heart monitor and a contraction monitor. They monitored her heartbeat while they asked me some questions about my medical history. Finally they took me to have an ultrasound to determine her position. She was still breech, very high up in my ribs. They took me back to Triage and started getting me ready for the version. They had to hook me up to an IV which was kind of funny because the nurses were having the hardest time finding my veins! The first nurse didn't even attempt to poke me because she couldn't even find a good vein in my arm because I'm so puffed up from being pregnant. The second nurse came in and started searching my arm for a vein, once she thought she found one she stuck the needle in, well when she did the vein "rolled" as she said and she couldn't get it in. She tried maneuvering the needle for a while (yeah that didn't feel too good!) After about 10 minutes she gave up on getting the IV in my arm and put it in my hand instead. Lots of poking! After they finally got me on the IV the doctor came in to talk to me about what they were going to do. He assured me he's done this many times and he said that the chance of me having an emergency c-section was 1%. I felt confident that he could do it. He told me I was having some mild contractions so they were going to give me a shot of Terbutaline to relax my uterus. Holy cow that stuff burns! It felt like they injected acid into my arm. The nurse warned me the Terbutaline would make my heart race (as if it wasn't already!) They brought in the ultrasound and laid me flat on my back and put like a whole bottle of gel on my stomach, then the doctor started pushing and pulling on the baby which hurt! She did not like it either, as soon as he would lighten his hold on her, she would whiplash back into the same position. he kept pushing harder and harder and I was trying to breath and relax but I couldn't catch my breath which made me panic and gasp for air and for some odd reason I started to laugh. I think I was trying to look like I was ok even though I was in pain. I didn't want them to stop because they thought they were hurting me so I laughed it off.  The nurse kept monitoring her on the ultrasound while the doctor kept trying to turn her, then he suddenly stopped when he noticed her heart rate had dropped. He stopped and told me to try and breath which was hard because I now had tears coming out of my eyes from the pressure. They noticed I wasn't breathing very good so they went and got me an oxygen mask. Her heart rate had still not picked back up even though they had stopped so they had me turn on my side to see if that would help. After a couple minutes her heart rate climbed back up so the doctor told me that he didn't think it was a good idea to keep going. he said he thinks the cord is in the way and that might be why she won't turn and that she's in the breech position for a reason. He told me he thought if he kept going I would end up being that 1% of an emergency c-section. So sadly, I agreed. They had to  keep me on the monitors for a while to make sure my breathing returned to normal and that her heart rate stabilized. After about half an hour the nurse said we were both doing awesome and that we could go. 
   So now we will be having a scheduled c-section. I'm very grateful that our baby is safe and that she will be ok. The reason I am not looking forward to a c-section is because I had wanted the full birth experience. I wanted to feel what labor was like and  I wanted to see her being born. I wanted to have her in my arms as soon as she was out. I wanted the whole experience. The nurses were telling me that I was lucky I wouldn't have to experience the pain of labor, that I would just get to lay back and let the doctors do the work. But that just upset me, I wanted to work for my baby, I wanted to bring her into the world. I also did not want an epidural, reason being is that I like to be in control of my body. I don't like not being able to feel or control my body. People think I'm crazy that I didn't want an epidural if I were to have a regular birth, but again, I wanted that experience of feeling my baby being born. Yeah sounds strange but that's what I had wanted. I know this isn't the worst thing that could happen. I am very grateful my baby is healthy and that I have wonderful, skilled doctors and either way,  I will have a baby! It may not be how I wanted it but that is life. I know I am lucky to have a healthy baby and that there is modern medicine that makes it possible to deliver her by c-section. Back in old days a breech baby meant complications and sometimes killed women and their babies. So I am very glad for the skilled medical field we have today. I want to thank you all for your prayers on our behalf and showing us all your love and support. In the end, we will have our baby girl and we will love her! 

Not so great news from the Doc :(

So today we had our 35 week ultrasound to check and see if Baby Girl is in proper birth position. Just like always, she was being stubborn. And it turns out she is breech. She has her feet curled up next to her head which is right under my rib cage. We met with the doctor right after and she told us the odds of her turning head down on her own are not good this far along into the pregnancy. She said there is a procedure they can do at the hospital to manually turn the baby but it only has a 60% success rate and there is a high risk the cord could get wrapped around the baby which would lead to an emergency c-section that I would not be conscious for. Our only other option would be a scheduled c-section at 39 weeks. Jacob and I decided to take the risk and try the procedure to turn her. We realize it is very risky but we both feel that we should try. If they manage to turn her successfully without problems then everything can go as planned. We're both very scared and of course worried about the baby's safety. The procedure is sometime next week, we have to wait for the hospital to call us. It's scary to think we could have a baby next week. We are praying that everything will be ok. We feel everything will be alright. The Dr checked my cervix and I am 60% effaced and 1 cm dilated. This baby is going to be here sooner rather than later it seems now. Right now we are doing everything we can to prepare for the baby, getting our bags packed, making sure our jobs are aware of what's going on and getting last minute items. I'm trying to stay positive, it's just scary to think if things don't go right I won't be awake for the birth of my baby. But I know I will be in good hands. We can only pray, who knows, maybe by some miracle she will feel the need to flip around on her own then we wouldn't have to worry! We shall see. . . Sorry this post isn't so bright and cheery but I feel like keeping everyone in the loop.